I am going on a reactionary date tonight with a so called “CityGent”

Cant even remember exactly how old, but I remember he is over 50!

This is a knee jerk reaction to my father’s newest antics. He has not even told me himself, it came through the grape vine. He is expecting a girl. Even though I have been expecting this news due to My fabulous Uncle said that Dad had asked how to spell “Elizabeth” ( my Gu’s name).

The son he had was because he wanted a son, but now having a daughter confirms that I am simply not good enough.

My sex was not the problem it is simply me as a human. I don’t know what to feel.

Hurt, pain, hate, anger, revenge and sadness.

He is 64! What I simple don’t understand is the fact that his father died when he was 15 so he knows how it feels to be missing a parent.

I say that but my mother bought me and my sister up single handily with only his allowance into her bank account for support.

I know it’s pretty fucked up but this “CityGent” guy actually seems sweet (with a wonderful dark side of course). Even though older he has a similar “why not” and “Id rather be out experiencing new things rather than sat at home” approach as I do.

Meeting him in Moorgate (I’ll be getting on my happen and tinder too of course – easy city boys!) and going to a new Wine bar that he’d like to try.

Im actually excited. He’s tall, kinky and good escape but hope he isn’t too old looking!!