Tag Archives: Fitness

New years, New Bugger all!

After a lovely Christmas with sea swimming, pool jumping and of course WAY too much food it was back to London. The most exercise I did was move from the sofa to the fridge and bathroom so back to London to stop eating and get my heart rate up once more!

Speaking of heart rate I haven’t had a fuck since L (a highly damaged, 33 year old, twice married man from Dubai. He doesn’t drink, smokes weed and is very dominant, but we have not fully disclosed that yet.) a week before Christmas and I am chomping at the bit!! However I did have an oral session with a local…. Who’s mother is best friends with mine, oopsy! Ha. Good practice I guess and proving that all blokes are a little different. L likes slow, deep, very deep oral while he plays with me. The other likes sucking his head while speedily stroking his shaft and tickling his balls. Each to their own, as they say and as I say’ give to get – just rude if they don’t and these 2 are!

The food has quite simply gone so way out of hand. I was on a non stop binge and avoiding blood tests!. The combination of not having enough of a break to have a true reading and avoiding seeing those double figures. My belly has returned with a vengeance (see pics). Oh and dear lord! My arms!!!! I don’t even know where to begin. And FUCK ME!! Where has my jaw line gone? More chins than a Chinese phone book. Ive turned into rolly fucking polly and it needs to change!

As soon as I arrive in London im off to do a hill spin class and then on New Years Eve I did a gruelling 90 min Bikram Yoga session before donning a glitter dress and heels. Yup that’s right I dressed up!

NYE was on a boat with 119 gays – and the bloody the best yet! Boobs were on full show and the dress was full sparkle! Even the gays loved my tits! The booze was flowing and the amount of drugs being consumed was about as subtle as a punch in the ovary – 1 guy was clinging onto a wall saying “im loving this hole!” As I looked over his partner for the night and I had the drug connection. “We all know whats going on, as long as everyone is looking out for one another”   It was only back at a house party where I shared my white stuff with my cousin and one of the biggest entertainment recruiters in the country, that I learned they were all on blooming MD! Ha. Sharing is caring…… made me question how much they loved me and my tits though. As always I wanted another place to go and ended out in bloomin Dalston (again!) with 2 that I had met just an hour earlier. Thinking they were gay I thought it was all good. Smashing the organic vodka and more lines the host retired to bed and the other invites me to cuddle on the couch. Sure he’s gay after all! WRONG!!! He started stroking and the usual brushing of the tit and kissing my head. AAAAHHHHH! I bailed so fast I got and Uber. Bank account minus £55, Brain cells minus,cant even count that far any more and dignity? Fuck lost that years ago!

My bloods this night began rather high (18.2) due to Bikram high. This was no helped later on by the fact that the boat did not stock Slimline tonic (Pfff! You’d think they would but no). So I had the 2 that were given to me and gave myself 2 bolus units and switched to the good old skinny bitch (Vodka, FRESH lime and soda – Cordial tastes like bleach!). A few hours later I was down at 7 and the “Party Basal rate” went on along with a temp basal of 0% for 2 hours. 2 hours, ½ gram and countless drinks later equalled a bg of 8. The first house party saw the pressure test…. Blood test infront of people including a doctor. Naturally I bragged about how amazing my Accu-check mobile was “it’s the best bloodtest out there and its only because of this that I do so many blood tests” and the “Meter error” appeared 4 times!!! Finally it worked and tah dah 6.6! Phew. Avoided the next day due to, well, Making up for burned calories and raised heart beats the night before!!

Still the best night of fireworks, Kylie, dancing like a tit (great tits though) and more snogs than ever, EVER!!! Why my mother question my sexuality and why im single, I’ll never know! Ha.

Bikram is getting a little better ( I dont want it to be easier) and ive found a new challenge. My hips simply don’t rotate so one new goal is to be able to do “The Tree” I cant even get my leg above my knee let alone by my hip!! But I also discovered a new problem with the pump, well the cannula. So im keeping the pump in my shoes outside the heated room of sweat, which keeps it cool so not to make the insulin null and void. Great. But with my new ability to stretch a little further on the backwards bend the stickyness of the canella (not helped with a small douse of sweat either) started to slip away from my skin. So much of the adhesive had let go an hour in I had to pull it out and thus had to run back home pretty sharpish to suppress some of the rush of sugar into my blood stream. I was 28! Bloody wonderful!

In a foul mood I have just booked 3 dates. Tomorrow’s is with an Italian kinkster. He loves spanking, whipping, master/slave and wants to here about what I was thinking about (him) the other day…. Going to read some kink to have him wrapped around my little finger in public!! The secont is a guy covered in tats from tinder. Ive told him id like to explore and push boundaries sexually – I don’t think he has any idea, really but the bruises on my arse will be a sure give away! Ha). The third and final of the week? Well….. this is going to be an extremely kinky, sordid affair. Booked into a hotel not been told where yet. Im excited!!

Food: Back to little more than normal

Exercise : Getting there but need to up to loose the gut

Men: Well, seems my Gay-dar was off and bad moods leads to book too many!!

Up to the second updates on good old twitter: Blacklaced88

Was Geri Right? Bikram yoga virginity lost!

Was Geri Right?

Friday – 12/12/14

Before I begin i am writing this on the 18th, Blogging everyday may be totally unrealistic but I will do it as much as I can, sometimes ever more than one story a day ….. For real time updates im constantly revieling probably too much on my twitter @blacklaced88 – go on, give us a follow!

So I lost my bikram yoga virginity today……. Well. Wow! It’s a 90 minute class and lets say Im still torn. Quite frankly, I think yoga, breathing in, breathing out, hmmmm, stretching blah blah is dull. Give me a spin class any day. However the heat and humidity has bought a whole new dimension. At about 60 min in I thought I was going to projectile vomit or faint. It was intense but it took a certain mental capacity to overcome it and I did.

I went into the class at 11 and worrying about the combination of a new exercise, heat and the length I ate ½ a pack of mini haribo’s. I couldn’t imagine anything more embarrassing than having a hypo in public, let alone in a new class, full of new people.

While I was there I discovered I am only flexible in 1 direction and that’s bent over (quel surprise – Guess it could be practice!), the other directions I was struggling. My heart was pounding, racing and breathing hard and fast. It felt like a HIIT session and the sweat?! Holy moly! Wet. That’s the only way I can describe it. I was dripping and my towel soaked through and that was before the class had started. Within a minute of being in there, I was down to my Sports bra. I hate my jelly belly, feeling it jiggle with every step, blaming insulin sites but I couldn’t give a shit. Off my top went. I wish I could have taken my leggings off but I wouldn’t want the police called for indecent exposure or being sectioned! Ha.

On exiting I did another BG. 18!! Bloody hell. Thirsty, Thirsty, High bloods Thirsty! Put mu pump back on, Bolused and crack on with the day. The worry of going hypo is also to do with the similar symptoms of course to pushing your body and mind physically. Sweating, increased heart rate, blurred vision, shaking, headache, nausea and possibly slurring!

While in the room at 43 degrees and 50% humidity I hated it. It took a lot of mental energy to stay. But afterwards as I sat in the fresh air (still dripping) I felt exhilarated, hungry and suddenly cold! I am looking forward to the pain tomorrow. Geri Haliwell once proclaimed on her jumper that “Yoga Kills” Lets see shall we….

But They’re Carb Free!

I had every intention of going to Body pump at 630 this morning. The Buzzing and sining from my phone attacks my ears as the cold nip in the air tickles my nose. Out from the cocoon I go. Bloodtest. 3.4. Great! That’s a mint whip (M&S), lowering my bolus to 0% for 1 hour and back to the warm duvet cocoon. No Body pump.

I wake up at 12 in a diabetic hangover and BG’s up at 17! Feeling groggy, podgy and the spots on my chin are rumbling, I open the fridge and see what I can snacl on. Boredom is my enemy. Yes I could and know I should find something to do, anything, even my Christmas shopping (Eugh). I don’t want to leave the house. To make me feel worse my date this evening is not replying – fucking time waster!! I would have found someone else to go out with, it is Thursday after all.

My skype chat pings – it can only be James. James…… We have never met, just cyber met through POF (I’m covering all bases – POF, Tinder, Luxy, Happn and Fet). He seemed sweet but I knew straight away he was into kink, proper kink. He’s into consentual non consent, whips, belts, choking. He’s always said that he’s going to come over and I wont have a say what he does to me. It dangerous but exciting. He asks if im horny. Well, yes. Standard. As always! “meeting you at 3” he orders. “I’m at lunch” “im coming over at 3” this goes on until I shock him. In the time ive left it I have had a random job interview over the phone, definitely was not expecting it and made me shaking like a leaf. I think I fucked it. I tell James and he says that he can bring a bottle too. Brilliant! “come over”

I give a vague address, tell him what im wearing, what I want him to do. He tells me what he will do. “Fine come over and we’ll discuss safe words and boundaries over the wine.”

“Ok….. Ah shit! My meeting’s been changed to earlier.”

“Flake”

I go to the fridge and pick some more. Pork Crackling – That’s right. The Gods that are M&S food development team have done it again (The food hall is my church). Pork Crackling sticks. They’re carb free, They’re carb free, They’re carb free! My left arm twinges if I actually think about it! Chomp through 3 of them as my phone pings again. Sam. He’s from Abu Dhabi and taking me out tomorrow evening. He claims he works in fashion and claims he wants more than a fuck…. THEN WHY ARE YOU LEADING WITH FUCKING?!!! “tantric sex” “are you horny” “do you like sex” Pahaha. Im still going on a date with him. I challenge him and he says that’s why he wants to take me out, but asking my dress size? I’m dubious. Hope he’s as hot as his pictures!!

In the mean time there are 2 more dates being set up. Both from fet. Monday’s date im nervous about seems extreme. French, 6”6 wants a Sub. I will be meeting wearing a red scarf. (by his request of course – Glad I have a selection. Vintage Liberty? Or Alexander McQueen?) Tuesday’s also wants a Sub, but seems more vanilla, until we close the doors of course! All I can hope is that my markings from the previous night don’t anger him.

Smashed a body combat class at 2030 and now here I am picking at more food, nuts and cereal, waiting for sleep to set in. With the wind whistling through the fucking broken seals and bloods still high from exercise, I’m retiring. No fucking but certainly set up for the next few days at least….

Food: Crap

Exercise: Moderate

Men: Meh…. I’m sure I wont be waiting long.

 

Give me a follow on Twitter @blacklaced88 for real time updates.

“POP”….. There goes my Blogging Cherry

I have decided that I am going to do an experiment all about weight loss, food, drink and real life living.

“Just another one of those looking for attention and a little motivation to get through it” I hear you all say.

Well, yes. However I have 2 new angles to come from. Firstly I have type 1 diabetes. Had it since 1992 and am (trying) to control it with an insulin pump. Secondly, and this is the biggie…. It’s 10 days before Christmas and no I am not going to stop eating mince pies, drinking (copious amounts) or a turkey dinner or several.

SHIT!! Yes I will be taking pictures getting bigger or smaller and yes I will be brutally honest. The honesty will be EVERYTHING from drinking, fried and baked goods (mmmm Baked goods) to drug intake and fucking….. It is exercise after all.

The reason I want to do it? See if it is possible to “live” without being that wet wipe at a party drinking soda water and only having the 1 lettuce wrap. And its also a personal challenge of controlling my bloods and quite possible remembering a little more of my London nights.

My accounts are very honest and open from my drug and alcohol consumption to my sexual encounters and dates. Weighty issues also.

I will try to blog everyday.

Please be aware that this is not medical advice and is solely from my personal experience, encounters and my thoughts.

This is day one I guess….